So one cancelled flight-hotel-stay-still-recovering-from-an-illness-gained-when-I-returned-from-Berlin-now-sending-late-tax-returns-in-a-dusty-room-in-lagos-over-dodgy-wifi-cos-ee-didn’t-unlock-my-phone-like-i-paid-them-to-please-never-use-them-wait-where-am-i-going-with-this-ah-! later, I find myself here again:

taking stock.

Last year, I wrote this blog piece’s predecessor (here) through a spurt of random inspiration as I was working abroad at the time. Strangely enough, I’m writing this in the same thread of of the last one but with a bit of sombre tone. But it’s not all dark-sidey. I promise.

Once again, it’s worth noting that I don’t write blogs because I find it hard to stay on track and to be honest, too many things happen for me to sit down and write without thinking of everything. Plus, I just don’t really like speaking about myself much.

I’m very much still the freelance photographer, filmmaker, poet, etc that I was last year so this piece is coming from the perspective of someone who basically lives on the financial edge.

2016 *shivers* has been one hell of a hard year. I’d argue it was hard for many on global scale. Alongside the personal L’s we might have taken, there were the global ones: Trump, bombings, natural disasters, Aleppo, favorite celebs passing away out of nowhere, etc.

And many (rightfully so) can’t take anymore. They’re done. Slumped, beaten and not sure where to look for hope. Many of us probably don’t feel we’ve done anything worth talking about this year. Maybe you feel you didn’t reach personal targets in work, love, play: life.

Quite frankly, many aren’t sure of where or whom to turn. Even now, writing this piece in some new place away from what I know, I feel you. For real. I came into year off the back of an insanely testing one. And as a freelancer, you do the math. Taking blows and running with it. Determined to see it through. I had plans for 2016 yo. Big ones.

Then right out of nowhere, 2016 goes: here take this L. And another one. And another one, don’t ever play yo-you get the point.

I lost work, friends/family to misunderstandings and death, opportunities, gear, energy, health time and more. I still forged forward with the belief that this was all part of some great process determined to make me stronger. I believed this especially since reading this quote:

“man lives to be victim to even greater suffering”

That is to say, whatever struggle I find myself facing, this isn’t where I fail. To be victim to greater suffering, also means to be victor over each one because there’s meant to be an even greater one coming. Does that make sense? It does to me.

So yeah onwards. But still, there comes that big L (pun intended) that knocks you for six and you want to quit. For me, that came in the shape of my friend, mentor, parkour coach and brother Brian Appiah Obeng. A pillar of the international parkour community, a budding actor and overall shining example of what man had the potential to be.

His sudden passing shook us all and burying him was a kind of hell for me. But even then at the funeral, I was reminding of his mantra’s and mine. How we lived for the risks/challenges. How parkour athletes took the fails and got excited at the prospect of getting stronger to beat them and add to the progress record. We just kept it moving.

So I took stock. I seriously thought about it. And then I relaxed.

2016 was tough. Yeah, sure. But it hadn’t stopped me from living. It only served to test my resolution. It tested my direction, choices, relationships. It tested me. It broke me down to the point where I could see myself scattered and pick up pieces that made me whole without the filler.

I understood myself, my place in the world and what that meant. It brought me peace. Suddenly, I had a progress report. 

All the achievements I hadn’t celebrated because I was too busy focusing on trying to best last years record, caring about the next person, aiming for monetary gain, not enjoying the crafts/process, etc. I was killing myself through the work that was supposed to give me a lease on life.

So, as I’m typing this, tired as heck in a humid country where mosquitoes are snipers on the edges of mosquito notes waiting for me to slip up, I want to ask you to do yourself and I a favour.

I want you to take a sheet of paper (or 2, 3, etc) or your iPads, phones, etc. On it, title a page:

2016 Achievements & Lessons

and write them all down. 

Why?

It’s simple.

We spend so much time watching others that we forget to blow our own horns. You never tell yourself you’re dope for getting stronger, faster, better. You never congratulate yourself for making it through the day, not burning toast, forgetting to zip your fly, get that portrait, finish that commission, getting noticed, finding love, graduating, getting your dream job, your parents understanding you, frying the best portion of plantain you’ve ever tasted in your life or even understanding how cranes are built on top of buildings without using Google (no seriously, how Sway!?)

So list them. Go crazy. Be as specific as you can when you list them.

I keep a board pinned up with items from all the dope things I’ve done, places I’ve been and stuff. It reminds me of the times I thought I was done and then something dope came along and I was proven wrong. It tells me I’m not done. I know the list will tell you the same.

And here’s a hashtag for you: #TakeStockChallenge. Use it everywhere. Heck, let’s make it go viral! You don’t have to use social media if you don’t want to. It’s for you in in the end but if possible let’s encourage yourself and others to big up the efforts you’ve all made. 2016 was a brief second of torture that you overcame and you are well on your way to being the amazing version of yourself that you were always going to be.

Oh, before I forget, let me get you started with some of the things I’ve done this year:

- gone on a UK concert tour with Brandy as official photographer
- shot The Game, Noname and Jeremih in concert
- commissioned to shoot Katy B and John Newman for VO5
- commissioned by Expedia for a location shoot
- flown in and out of the UK 7 times for work
- toured with my US poets on a UK poetry tour 
- had my work premiered on Saint Heron, VSCO, WeTransfer, Metro UK, blogs, etc
- both my Goddaughters turned 1 this year
- album artwork I created on Spotify
- exhibited work with my collective SXWKS
- directed my first film and had it screened at a sold out premiere
- won gear I couldn’t afford from companies I’ve dreamt of (InCase & Fujifilm)
- owning 3 cameras (at time of writing this) instead of the one I started this year with 
- met Mick Jenkins and Noname (photographed both too)
- developed stable income and acquired stable clients.
- executed personal ideas
- learnt myself anew

and the list goes on

So do yours y’all and feel good about it. The future becomes that much more appealing especially when you allow yourself to enjoy what you do and congratulate yourself. No matter what it is r what you’re going through. You’re further than where you were the last time you felt down or unaccomplished.

It’s like I say these days: the world’s been yours. So write that list and buy yourself a virgin mojito. Yes. A virgin mojito.

#TakeStockChallenge

- Jolade

PS. hit me up on Twitter (@JoladeO_), Instagram (@JoladeO) or email (thejolade@gmail.com) if you wanna talk or something. We all out here together.